These words won’t resonate for some, but for others they are crucially important:
How much is going to be enough?
How many promotions are you going to say yes to, because they asked, because they want you? Rather than because you want it, have the bandwidth for it, can manage your other responsibilities, be there for the ones you love and take the job.
How many marathons is enough marathons? Who are they for? What is it that you think they say about you, when your knees are shot and your back hurts? Is all that pain for that moment of glory a good deal?
How perfect does that event have to be? Are you micromanaging every tiny piece of it, lest something be missing or someone find fault with it? What does it look like when you find a way to say this is enough, leave the rest to grace and let things be. How might life be different then? Less stressful, more grounded.
How much love is enough love? Do you really need everyone to like you? Do you feel discomfort that that one person over there doesn’t seem to like you very much? Can you live with it? Can you find a way to let the love that surrounds you (I have no doubt of this) be enough?
How far?
How fast?
How many?
How perfect?
Before you understand that no amount of external can bring you peace internal.
Before you realise that you are unique, whole, loved and that everything is going to be ok.
Everything is going to be ok. Let go and let be a little more. Search inside yourself for the feeling of trust.
The photograph above is the perfect illustration: you’ve been stretching towards that final room for too long. That’s where you think love, acceptance and safety lie.
But look around you, it is here. You are already in the room. You are alive, loved and brilliantly you and there is no other who is just like you in the whole world. Your folks don’t love you because you are perfect, they love you for your insconsistencies and foibles. Those are things that make you wonderfully human.
And the ones who don’t love you? That’s their choice. There is nothing you can or should do about it. Not loving is their problem to solve, not your challenge to win.
You are enough. I know you have been broken, made mistakes and stumbled. Did you think there could be a life without pain if you just worked hard enough?
Stop killing yourself for the eternal something or someone else that will prove you are good. Learn the art of love in all its forms and acceptance, energy and joy will surely follow.
Sarah x