Practising Wisdom

We have to practise wisdom.  There are things that we know to be true and yet lose sight of every day.  Just knowing isn't enough; we have to practise what we know.

Believing that you have enough and knowing that you are enough is one of these things.

If you are telling yourself every day that you don't have enough money, sleep, wisdom, energy, confidence, experience to do the things that you want and need to do, then you will come to believe it.  This will make you afraid and will stop you from doing all the things you would like to do.

If you cannot appreciate all that you have achieved, how far you've come, the money you have earned, who you are, for thinking about the miles you have yet to go to reach your goals, then you will forever feel inadequate and limited.  Don't postpone your gladness until you have more, weigh less or achieve something new; you know that to defer your happiness in this way is never to reach it.

And somehow we all bought into the idea that if you have enough money, anything is possible, when we know that money without love is meaningless and wealth without personal courage is worthless.  Do what you can with what you have available to you and don't let lack of funds be your excuse.

Practice is as simple as taking five minutes every night to be grateful for how much you've done that day, for the friendship of others, for the small things that made your day better, whether it was lunch with a friend, a tick on your to do list, or a walk in the sunshine.  It switches your brain chemistry around, so that instead of feeling the pressure of not enough, you get to climb into bed with a smile on your face and the feeling of contentment.  There might be more to do tomorrow, but today was good.

Gratitude grows then, and a positive outlook; not one in which we berate ourselves for all of the ways we lack and are lacking, but one in which we hold space for all that we have, all that we are, and all that we are becoming.

Time to Relax

Perhaps instead of signing up to a mindfulness course, or trying to establish a meditation practice, all you really need to do is commit to practising relaxation regularly.

We're all really good at the doing of life - striving, setting goals, working hard and getting things done - it's the calming ourselves down part, the letting go of stress and worry that we could use some help with.

Relaxation practice is not doing nothing: it's the active process of sparking up the peaceful half of your nervous system.

Here's what happens when you relax: your blood pressure lowers, your heart rate drops, your brain waves slow down, your digestion speeds up, your immune system is boosted, chronic muscular tension and pain is reduced, the quality and quantity of your sleep is improved ...

If you have been struggling with sleeplessness, headaches, anxiety, back pain or IBS, stress, anger, depression; if you seem to catch every bug that's going around, or you feel constantly exhausted, then it could be that a regular relaxation practice will change your life for the better. 

In addition to this, your capacity to remain calm in the face of challenge and difficulty will revolutionise the way you live, your capacity for forgiving yourself for all of your little mistakes will increase, your worries won't seem so overwhelming any more and your frustrations with everyday life will diminish. 

Relaxing is how you set yourself straight again when the world has wrung you out.
Relaxing makes us better humans. 
Might as well start tonight.

Full instructions provided in the image above.

New Year, Old You

As if there is someone better that you are supposed to be!  You cannot turn yourself into someone else, better not waste your time trying.  In any case, if you lose 10 pounds or run that marathon, if you earn that amount of money or get that promotion do you really think that the worries that keep you awake at night will cease?  That your suspicions about your deep inadequacy will magically be shed like the weight, cast off with the miles run?  Of course not.  

There is so much joy, peace and happiness to be found in the realisation that you are already whole and good and have so much to give.  It doesn't cost anything and you can start right now. 

Find someone you admire, not because they are rich or beautiful, but because they seem to be happy and full of generosity, because they move through difficult times with grace, because they are authentic - use that person as your inspiration.  Look beyond the surface of things to find your heroes.

Don't wait!  Don't put it off until you are thinner, more financially secure, braver, have company.  Don't procrastinate!  Start here, where you are today, start talking to yourself as if you were your own best friend, start being kinder to other people, as you wish others were kinder to you, start taking the pressure off yourself, smile at the world and see if it smiles back (and when it doesn't, don't let it get you down, learning how to bear that is called resilience).  Stick with it!  What you are embarking upon is a way of living, an internal transformation, an experiment in kindness and acceptance directed both inwards to yourself and outwards to a world which is sorely in need of it.  And as you move forward in this way, you will surely begin to notice how all the other facets of your life simply fall into place, either because they are the natural outcome of the way you are living, or because the new way you are living helps you to sort that which is necessary from that which is only background noise.

It's not easy, this continual turning back towards what truly matters - if it was easy then everybody would be doing it and they quite clearly are not.  You will be ranging yourself against the power of global advertising to make you feel inadequate, you will oftentimes find yourself turning away from the group, as you prioritise your health and well-being over group dynamics.  But deep down, you know what is important and in small increments you can create a life dedicated to seeking and abiding with those things.  You will feel the benefit, no doubt, but more important than that, so will everyone else around you: energised and happy people give more, have more time for others, are kinder and more patient.  So what works for you will work for everyone else too.